wilxxx (wilxxx) wrote,

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i'm tired...

it has only been a few weeks of being back at school. I'm having a great time here at the frat house, but at the same time i'm so lonely. all the work is already starting to wear on me. all i can do is keep trying to stay caught up (if thats what you cal this frantic chaotic work schedule). I miss having someone there to understand and empathize and help me through it. That's what teresa used to do. I know I could never date her again but i wish she would still help me out like she used to.

I used to think i missed teresa, but really i just miss having someone there...I don't really feel anything for her anymore i don't think. When I broke up with her, I did it because my feelings had died and I wasn't happy at all with her. Now I wish i was around her only so that I have someone to bitch to about life's suckiness at times, i guess. thats not the healthiest relationship, and I'm starting to think I only get depressed and lonely when I start remembering how I was when I was with her. I can't go back to that...I was so blah. Never again...

in conclusion...i guess i'm gonna keep truckin with my school work and keep my eyes on the prize (med-school!!). I'll find someone to make me happy again some day but i'm not going to want anyone but what i'm used to. And sadly, what i'm used to isn't right for me for a number of reasons. i'll be lonely until the fraternity, achordants and school work consume my soul.
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